Note: This teaching is not on the theology of the Trinity. The Holy Spirit is always part of the Godhead. Within God, the Holy Spirit is perfect. Within man, the spirit is not allowed to always be in control. Man’s spirit is imperfect. This is understood and will not be continuously mentioned as the emphasis is on the position of God and Jesus in comparison with husband and wife. This is not a theological discourse.
Most people go into marriage unprepared. They have this “Cinderella” storybook idea that when they get married they will live happily ever after. When, in fact, over half the marriages today end in divorce and most of the others are not what they could be and should be. Many people end up enduring marriage out of insecurity, financial handicaps and/or religious convictions. Many husbands feel cheated that their wives are boring, overweight and frigid; while some women think their husbands are rude, insensitive, and make them feel sexually like a prostitute. Why do people feel this way? What went wrong? Can it be corrected?
First of all, marriage unites two imperfect people. Everyone carries extra, unnecessary baggage (problems) with them into marriage. No one here is exempt. Everyone, without exception, has a selfish, sinful nature that daily has to be dealt with. So all come into marriage with scars (some deeper) and blemishes that need to be cleansed and healed. As we allow ourselves to be cleansed, healing begins and marriage becomes successful
Genesis 1:26-27: “And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness; and let him have dominion over...So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.” In verse 26, we see the Father and Jesus decided to make man in His (God Trinity) image. God the Father, and God the Son (Jesus), two separate persons in divine individuality and divine plurality, capable of individually or collectively being called God. They are working in perfect unity as illustrated in verse 27, and throughout the Bible. They, God the Father and God the Son (Jesus), made man, the husband and the wife to work in perfect unity. When we speak of the plurality of man, or the human race (humanity), we mean both man and woman, as when we speak of the plurality of God we mean both God the Father and the Son, Jesus. Although the Father and the Son have different positions, they work selflessly in perfect harmony; each respecting and honoring the other. As man (husband and wife) matures in Christian character and conduct (sanctification), and their old baggage (selfishness, etc.) drops off, marriage becomes successful.
One of the most important ingredients in marriage is mutual respect. When one or both of the partners looses respect for the other, marriage looses its happiness. When we were dating, we accepted a date because we respected the person. By that person wanting to date us, we felt normal or wanted. People need to feel normal, wanted and accepted. We need to feel respected. Sometimes, we as people, can be quite unlovable and insensitive. Out of our immaturity, our selfish nature, which is not getting its own way, will attack (hurt or weaken) our spouse verbally or nonverbally instead of understanding that we are to blame. It is difficult to have the patience to minister to their need. We loose respect for them and they for us. We might even be so cruel as to say, “What’s wrong with you? Aren’t you normal?” Instead of building them up and helping to heal their weakness, we are tearing them down. Since the Bible tells us in Genesis 2:24, “and they shall be one flesh”, we are consequently destroying our marriage and ourselves. We are loosing the happiness, joy, companionship and sexual fulfillment that God had planned for us.
Another very important part of marriage is companionship. God (the Father and the Son) have perfect companionship one with another. They love being together, discussing things together: “Let us make man in our own image.” As the Father and Jesus have perfect companionship and fellowship, so they want man to have perfect fellowship also with them and each other (husband and wife). The companionship of God the Father and God the Son binds them together in wonderful unity. They respect one another. This companionship comprises an intimate bond and endures since sin and selfishness does not exist in it. The relationship between God the Father and God the Son is based on true partnership and equality even though position is different.
For marriage to be successful (filled with mutual respect, happiness and desire one for the other), there must be a true partnership relationship. As God the Father and God the Son accept each other as equal, so must husband and wife. Neither spouse must dominate or try to change the other’s individuality. As God the Father and God the Son could not exist and function successfully by competing or trying to dominate the other, neither can husband and wife. God the Father does not try to change Jesus’ individuality but recognizes the difference as complementary thus making the Godhead successful. The personality comprising the Fruit of the Holy Spirit (love, joy, peace, gentleness, meekness, goodness, temperance, patience and self-control) they possess in perfection. In order for compatibility between husband and wife to be successful as the Godhead, they also must develop in these areas derived from the Holy Spirit.